I Was Catfished Part One

This is my blog series about how I got catfished, lost my home, all my money, most of my belongings and had to start over. It began with an innocent conversation on Facebook to him flying half way across the world to move in, take over and destroy my friendships and self esteem. I have healed, moved on and am on my way back up. I want to share the story because there were so many red flags I missed, lies he told me that I made ok and how I got lost from myself. 

I posted that statement on FaceBook to announce this blog series and so many replied. Many that they too had this happen, some were still picking up the pieces and others were shocked that it could happen to someone as savvy as me. Savvy had nothing to do with it. I was taken by an expert manipulator that spent most of his life preying on women, living off of them and moving on. He had a system that worked very well and not just on me.

Yet there were red flags and so much loss that I kept making excuses about. I kept in self denial that this was happening even though I felt my world slowly go out of control, my friends walk away, I became more isolated, doubted myself, felt insecure and like walking on egg shells. 

I will start at the end of the story:

  • I ended up moving from a large ranch style house on a golf course in Marin County California near the wine country to a weekly low end hotel on skid row in Las Vegas, Nevada with my two cats, my computers, 1/2 my office and a few kitchen essentials. 
  • Every week I lived there I struggled to pay the weekly rent while I continued to work online 7 days a week for 14-16 hours a day.
  • My online presence was true but I hid my dirty secret that I had been used, taken advantage of and that I was basically homeless now.

What I did to change my situation:

  • During my 6 months there I coached a few women for free since they needed the support and I could help. Plus I believed that if I was of service, I would get my life back together.
  • I continued to teach live every Wednesday on my Gluten Sugar Dairy Free LifeStyle website and never lost my composure even if I spent the rest of the time raging or crying.
  • To be honest I went to victim mentality at first: This is so unfair. Why did this have to happen to me. Who is going to save me. Then I got empowered and started on a plan that would get me out of there.
  • I had written the International Best Seller Guide Book to living GSDF and so I did a pre sale of a cookbook I was writing. Every week folks pre bought the books and that paid rent. Then I finished the book, published it and shipped out over 400 copies of the pre orders!

Part Two will start at the begining of my story. A story that just finally ended a few weeks ago as I finally got all control over my websites, hosting and other online things that he controlled. To be catfished means to lure someone into a relationship by means of a fictional online persona. His persona was fictional as were his stories. I will share more in part 2. 

For those friends who will read this story and you met him, liked him or did not like him and warned me, this is not your fault and it was a journey I was destined to go on. I want that part to be very clear. I grew up with a narcissistic father who walked away from his family 20 years ago and this man was so similar to him that it was easy for me to get lost. For the friends that warned me: thank you for loving me enough to do that. For the friends that walked away: I understand why you had to do that. 

This series is intended to help others not fall prey to catfish like I did.

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